Grandson, let me tell you a tale of long long ago when men were men and sheep were scared.”

“Grandfather, why are the sheep scared”?

“I think you better talk to your father about that, after all he comes from the land of the long white cloud”.

“Anyway back to the story. Long ago in the mists of time lived good King David who is well known throughout the annals of history for his kindness and good works, and the dastardly usurper Count Andrew who is only known for his fight against King David. Let that be a lesson for you grandson”.

“What lesson Grandfather”?

“Oh Grandson, that if you grow up a right royal pain in the backside then you had better be whooped by someone who is loved by all those around him, then history may remember you”.

“Anyway back to the story. Long ago in the mists of time lived good King David…….”

“Grandfather where did he live?”

Sigh. “Grandson, he lived in an Island Kingdom far far away”

“Anyway back to the story. Long ago in the mists of time lived good King David…….”

“Grandfather where is the Island Kingdom”?

Exasperated! “Can you just shut up and let me tell the story…..”

Running away crying….” Mummy Grandfather is being grumpy again”.

Grandfather smiles and punches his fist in the air. “Yes!! I can now watch the 2016 Grand Final for the 145^th time!!”

“FATHER………………. as a signed up Oinker (sounds like) can’t you just read him 3 Little Pigs rather than tell one of your stupid stories”.

“Stupid stories? Stupid stories! Let me tell you a thing or two young lady ………….”

For the regular readers of this blog let me just tell you the unexpurgated “ stupid story” undisturbed as it really happened.True dinks.

Long long ago in an island kingdom far far away lived good King David who was being challenged by the dastardly usurper Count Andrew (but I guess you knew that by now).

On the plains overlooking the seaside town of Ryll the two armies met, with the Imposing Cavalry Knights (Land Raider Army) of King David facing off against the Saxon  Warrior Army of the evil Count Andrew in a Dux Bellorum 15mm battle.

The progress of the battle was aptly captured in the words of those great Manowar poets -Ross the Boss and Joey DeMaio,

“By moonlight we ride ten thousands side by side

With swords drawn held high our whips and armour shine

Hail to thee our infantry still brave beyond the grave

All sworn the eternal vow the time to strike is now.”

The battle began with Knights of King David thundering over the hills into the right flank of the usurper, Count Andrew.

King David charging at the front of his Knights.

 The usurper Count Andrew fighting on foot as the peasant he soon showed himself to be.

The downhill thundering hooves and cold steel of King David’s Knights proved too much for the usurpers cavalry and they broke almost on contact.

The infantry on the Saxon right flank was quickly surrounded but fought on far more manfully than their mounted friends.

The unanswered prayers of Count Andrew caused him to curse his Gods, and he switched allegiance not once but twice. All to no avail as you would expect from such a fickle follower.

King David and his Companions broke the last mounted troops of the usurper leaving his right flank all but destroyed.

 King David finally unleashed his reserves to attack the usurper and his fellow traitor companions who had already suffered losses.

The weight of hoof, superior cavalry, and cold steel caused the traitors to falter and then slowly retreat, causing all but one of his units to flee.

With this the battle and the usurpers head were lost.

 King David triumphant!!

Whilst the Gods were certainly in the King’s favour the fact that he was able to bring overwhelming superiority in both numbers and quality at the decisive point meant that victory was achieved in short time.

Another great game of Dan Mersey’s Dux Bellorum.